Idaho Mountain Express: Keep Your Tips Up

Friday, February 8, 2013

Keep Your Tips Up

Just wondering….why is it?

By WARREN MILLER

Some thoughts in the middle of winter:

Why is it that no matter how much you pay for your hotel, motel, lodge or condominium or how far in advance you make your reservations, you always get your deluxe room with a view right over the trash bin dumpsters?

Why is it that when you take your skis off of the roof of your car and lean them against the side of your car, they always fall over and scratch your car when you open the door to get your gloves and hat that you once again forgot?

Why is it that the runs on ski resort trail maps are always printed upside down? It’s as though you are going to select a ski run from the parking lot instead of the top of the mountain?

Why is it that after standing in line for 10 minutes to buy your ski lift ticket, you discover that the line you have been waiting in is for cash only, no credit cards?

Why is it that when the ski lift operators finally let you on the lift at 8:30 with 14 inches of new powder snow, the entire hill is already tracked up by ski instructors who have been riding the lift and skiing since 7:30, and they complain because they have only had six runs each before any paying customers got to ride?

Why is it that the buckle on one of your ski boots only breaks when you are tightening it up at the top of the mountain while you’re getting ready to make first tracks?

Why is it that the president of the company you work for will never wear anything to work except a dark suit and a contrasting tie, yet he goes skiing in an outfit that makes him look like the lead clown in the circus parade in San Francisco?

Why is it that the three people riding on the quad chairlift with you get several phone calls each and yours never rings?

Why is it that your wife and kids waited for you for half an hour at chair No. 11 at 12:00 and you waited for them at chair No. 10 at 11:00?

Why is it that the newscaster on the ski resort cable station looks the same age as the junior high school kid who delivers your newspaper?

Why is it that the website of the ski resort that you didn’t go to this winter, always has better snow than the ice you are now skiing on where you bought your season pass?

Just wondering……..
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