Wednesday, December 26, 2007

How Mama Spears raised her girls


The 2007 award for gall might well have gone to Lynne Spears, who was writing a book about parenting due for release on Mother's Day 2008. But, overcome with common sense, the Tennessee publisher of religious books had second thoughts about Spears' mothering skills.

So, "Pop Culture Mom: A Real Story of Fame and Family in a Tabloid World" is on hold, leaving fans wondering about Lynne Spears' secrets of raising Britney Spears, 25, and her sister, Jamie, 16, who're premiere topics of gossip and leers.

The better known of the two, Britney, sometime-singer and off-and-on mother of two infants and bed partner for whomever she taps for the night, is regarded in drug- and alcohol-rehab circles as a "train wreck." Jamie came into her own notoriety by divulging she's pregnant by an 18-year-old boyfriend. The notion he might be arrested for statutory rape of an underage girl makes titillating blog chatter, but not likely to happen in the world of sleaze the Spears girls inhabit.

Mama Spears can salvage her tome. She could find a new publisher and rewrite it as a paean to girls without proper upbringing who mock social convention to become favs of bloggers and paparazzi because of wicked behavior.

What would Britney Spears be today if not just a has-been singer who bar crawls regularly in a quest for a new bed partner, had she not shaved her head in a fit of pique, attacked a car with an umbrella, flashed the paparazzi without underpants, been in and out of court and rehab and briefly slummed high-class saloons with the equally jaded Paris Hilton?

As for Britney's sibling, Jamie, the current moment of fame rests on her pregnancy, lousy timing and worse reality. Her TV career as an actress was taking off—as the wise, virginal high school student "Zoey" on Nickelodeon. Now she's left some young fans disillusioned and their mothers trying to explain, wondering if Jamie in real life is more of a tramp than the model of decency she portrays on TV.

Maybe Jamie will find better type casting henceforth: Instead of a sweet young thing, she could be a vamp, a naughty teenage strumpet, a Baby Doll.

Being disreputable certainly hasn't hurt Britney's earnings. She now reports income of $737,000 per month, less expenses of about $207,000 per month, including alimony and support for ex-husband Kevin Federline.

So, she has $6.3 million left over each year to fritter away.

No telling how Jamie will do with her head start as a teenager if she wants to make a public spectacle of herself like big sister.

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