Monday night: The Casino
(Ring!)
"Casino!"
"Yeah, can you tell me what's on the menu tonight?"
"What?"
"I was in there last Monday night to watch Monday Night Football and you guys had a smorgasbord."
"Oh, yeah, local patrons bring in the food from home for the folks who watch the game and it's all free."
"Yeah, well I didn't feel so hot after I got home. I had to take a lot of Pepto Bismos."
"Hey, look, it's packed in here, I—"
"I just want to know what you're serving. I'm not comin' in unless I know what—"
"Hey, that's cool with me if you never come in."
"So, what are they serving?"
"I don't know. It's up to the people who donate the food!"
"Can you give me their numbers?"
(Click)
Tuesday night: Hailey City Council meeting
"All right, all right, everybody ... come to order. We've got a lot to cover this evening!"
"I have a question."
"Yes sir, but make it quick. We've got to cover these marijuana proposals."
"That's what it's about."
"All right—go ahead."
"Could you pass the bong over here?"
Wednesday afternoon—Ketchum
Ring!
"Toy Store."
"Yeah, do you have any toys for seniors?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"I'm 70 years old and I want a toy."
"All right, we've got 'Where's My Keys?' and 'Remember That?' and, oh yeah, 'Where in the World Am I?' They're all board games."
"I don't want games to make me bored!"
"No, no, they're board games like, you know, 'Monopoly' and 'Risk' and 'Sorry.'
"Well, I'm sorry, too. All I want is something to keep me amused during the holidays."
"How about crosswords?"
"Hey, I don't want to have cross words with you. I just want a toy!"
"Look, I gotta' go."
"You've got a 'Go' What's that like?
(Click)
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. ... Nice talking to you.
