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Editorials
For the week of December 27 through January 2, 2000

Resolution wish list


Ah, the time of resolutions is here again. What happier year could there be than one in which resolutions for improvement are kept?

With many good wishes for a Happy New Year, we’re offering this wish list of resolutions for reading, raving and general amusement.

Ketchum City Council: To avoid the hot seat by refraining from trying to ban smoking in all local restaurants.

President Clinton: To lie low after he leaves office, read a lot, write a lot, and let Hilary have the spotlight.

President-elect George W. Bush: To acknowledge loss of the popular vote; to vow not to take the Republican agenda too seriously, and to keep his hands off Clinton’s executive orders that created new national monuments in the West.

Rev. Jerry Falwell: To acknowledge that the country elected Dubya, not the Rev. Jerry Falwell.

American people: To review the electoral college plan for electing a president and decide whether or not to throw it out in favor of the popular vote.

Voters in counties with punch card systems: To make sure the systems are replaced within four years to ensure all votes are counted and to save the nation another Florida debacle.

Speeding skiers and boarders: To rethink the joy of speed on Baldy in the face of the hard and fast laws of physics, and court judgments against skiers/boarders involved in accidents in Colorado and Idaho.

Sun Valley, Bellevue, Hailey, and Blaine County: To follow Ketchum in adopting a Dark Skies Ordinance to protect the incredible view of the Milky Way in the crystalline altitude of the Wood River Valley.

Golden Eagle developers: To bring the height and width of their project’s giant berms into compliance with county ordinances and to drop the charade of trying to convince the county to grant variances to make the manmade hillettes legal as built.

Blaine County Commissioners: To hire some help to allow them to manage the big picture and to leave the micromanaging to others.

Retiring Blaine County Commissioner Len Harlig: To write some poetry and smell the roses.

U.S. Forest Service: To stand tough in the face of those who claim that the nation must get rid of forest fires by cutting down the trees that "cause" them.

Idaho Legislature: To back off on the ideological attack on Idaho Public Television and give it the funding and equipment it needs to bring educational programming on all kinds of issues and subjects to Idahoans.

U.S. Supreme Court justices: To take a night class in constitutional law and its practical application.

Cell phone users: To turn off the infernal contraptions when driving in traffic.

Aryan Nations leader Richard Butler: To leave Idaho and its peace-loving citizens and never come back.

New technology investors: To remember that the rules of business in a free market are the same for businesses that manufacture widgets and those that produce electronic information.

Idaho Department of Transportation: To repeat daily, "More lanes do not mean happiness."

Bureau of Land Management: To stay out of the real estate business in Blaine County by resolving to manage its lands here instead of selling them off.

Valley commuters: To adopt a friendlier (read safer) attitude toward others during rush hour and to sign up for the Rideshare program.

Outlaw snowmobilers: To refrain from trashing the new agreement between cross-country skiers and snowmobilers by sticking to designated use areas.

Wall Street: To learn again to pronounce recession (ree-seh-shun).

Picabo Street: To believe, believe, believe in more medals in 2002.

Idaho wolves: To swear off beef and lamb.

Ketchum Planners: To believe their eyes, if not their calculations, when they see a building that looks taller than city ordinances allow.

Valley medical community: To learn to take its own temperature.

California: Not to covet its neighbors’ electricity and to keep its mitts off Idaho water.

National Marine Fisheries Service: To go in for a spine transplant so it can once again provide good advice on the best options for salmon recovery.

Second District Congressman Mike Simpson: To write a bill creating a Boulder-White Clouds Wilderness Area, introduce it and get it passed.

 

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