Stop telemarketers in their tracks

Honk if you know anyone who collapses at home after a tough day battling the world’s unavoidable annoyances, then sighs aloud for the family to hear:

"Gee, I hope phone solicitors begin calling tonight at dinnertime to peddle something I don’t need or want."

Telephone solicitors ("telemarketers" to the trade) who badger uninterested families with their gooey do-I-have-a-deal-for-you pitches rank lower in public esteem than that other bred that makes promises they can’t keep-- politicians.

How to prevent these creatures from harassing Americans in their rare moments of peace and quiet continues to be a futile hope.

Idaho legislators are taking another crack at the problem. Their solution, once again, is unworkable. And, again, the "solution" puts the burden on the overburdened public.

A proposed Idaho law would require residents who don’t want to be annoyed to pony up $10 to register on a "do not call list." Telemarketers calling someone on the list would be fined.

Such silliness.

First, why should the public fork over $10 to stop pests from abusing them by telephone? These pests can just as easily use the infinitely less annoying and easily more disposable U.S. Postal Service for their pitches.

And second, does anyone believe that Idaho Attorney General Al Lance has the wherewithal– much less the interest– in adding investigators to track down phone solicitors who err by calling someone on the list, then prosecute them?

The criminal justice system now is utterly incapable of coping with the overload that’s swamping police, prosecutors, judges and prisons.

But there are "solutions."

Everyone acknowledges that phone solicitors are a public nuisance that need to be reeled in.

So why shouldn’t the burden rest with the folks who concoct these rude phone solicitations that bedevil people in their private moments?

My proposal:

Petition the feds to establish a national registry requiring charities and corporations to list the names and home telephone numbers of marketing executives responsible for phone solicitations.

Costs of listings and maintaining up-to-date data would be the responsibility of the telemarketing industry, not the bedraggled consumer.

Then, when interrupted at home by phone solicitors, annoyed families could call the 24-hour registry’s 800-number, obtain the home phone numbers of executives in charge of phone solicitors, then call them at their homes at an annoying hour.

Turn about is fair play!

After a few hundred calls at their home, these mindless predators with executive titles would soon learn the utter outrage their minions commit by disturbing the tranquility of American homes.

Meanwhile, other remedies can be used to swat these people.

When these pests call, hang up before they finish their first clammy promise.

Then, write letters to CEOs of the outfits– whether a major credit card company or a charity– and inform them you resent their unwanted calls, and (a) plan never again to do business with them and (b) will file a complaint with the Federal Communications Commission charging the charity or corporation with abusing telephone regulations by harassing you, and demanding their telephones be disconnected.

That’ll get far more attention than Idaho’s proposed wrist-slap.